


Our Early Departure

by Astrocorruption



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Eric Cartman Being An Asshole, I don't know why i wrote this instead of doing my actual assignments, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Titles, Kenny can't die, Kyle is the sweet one, M/M, No zombies so far, Out of Character, POV Alternating, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-26
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-11-06 03:38:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17932127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Astrocorruption/pseuds/Astrocorruption
Summary: Kenny couldn’t say he wasn’t glad society fell and monsters roamed the street, both human and undead alike.His home was gone. His abusive parents finally out of his life, probably dead. All in all, He had to say it was pretty sweet. Well it was after the initial panic. Now all he needed was to find his favorite red head and to keep him alive.Which is turning out to be harder than he had expected.





	Our Early Departure

The world had gone to shit. Everything destroyed and no hope of any type of normality ever again.

 

Kenny had to admit it was pretty sweet. He shouldn’t say he was glad society fell and monsters roamed the street, both human and Zombie kind alike. His “home” was gone. His abusive parents finally out of his life, probably dead by now. He hadn’t expected something like this would ever happen. Even though he really should have anticipated it…. I mean?? This is south park we’re talking about. Any kind of horror was possible in this small town. The surprising thing was that south park had been Last to be hit by the infection. Being such a rural area there wasn’t really a way for the virus to get to them quick.

 

When the outbreak started the first thing Kenny did was grab Karen and run. It didn’t even occur to him to figure out where they were going from there. She had to be safe no matter what. His was her Big bro, someone she could rely on. In Fact, he was her guardian angel and he took that job very seriously.

 

Finding somewhere safe to stay was now was his first mission, he packed as much as he could in two duffle bags, and they left. It wasn’t until he had her away from that hell hole, while they walked quietly along the train tracks staying as far away from the main road. That he realized, he didn’t have a plan. No food to feed them. No shelter. No roof over their head. 

 

They had nothing.

 

He should have been worried, terrified even, but he found himself unable to conjure up the feeling. People dying and turning into creatures trying to eat anyone they see should have bothered him more than it this. Maybe everything they had put through over the years had numbed him from everything. They could worry about the insanity the world was now AFTER they found a safe place to hold up. Kenny had never been good at strategizing what to do in bad situations like this. He was good at quick fire decisions that had no long baring consequences. Not ones that would be good for his overall survival. But one of his friends was an expert in good at making decisions.

 

He Immediately knew where to go. They had to make their way to the next person on his list of people he needed to protect. He would know what to do. If there was one person who could sort all this shit out. It was him.

 

Kyle was the smartest person he knew.

 

Getting to the red heads house had been unsurprisingly.... a mess. There was a mass of people panicking on the street, most extremely sketchy looking. From what he could tell they weren’t infected or anything, but Kenny could swear he had seen Mr. Marsh smashing in a car in topless. He didn’t like any of this at all. There was a Cars were left all over the road. Most of them empty except for a few with “dead” in them. So, there was infected in the town.... He wondered where they were hoping to go? To family? Out of the country? He was pretty sure the fact that south park had been the last to be hit would mean everywhere else was probably in way worse condition. And south park so far didn’t seem to be doing too well itself.

 

Kenny quickly realized that moving through the streets was not an option. The forest was a way easier and less dangerous way, if not a bit tedious and longer. Still he helped Karen through it, while carrying two heavy bags. Until they finally reached the familiar house. 

 

Nothing looked out of place. Which he was glad for. He had just assumed Kyle would be okay the entire trip, but now that he was in his yard, worry creeped up on him full force. He hadn't seen or heard from Kyle in two days. Which wasn't unusual since Kenny didn't have a phone right now. 

 

He reached for Karen’s hand as they knocked on the door. She gave it a reassuring squeeze which calmed him considerably, he hadn’t realized his heart was racing. He couldn't bear the thought that Kyle was hurt. But the Ginger was prone to attracting bad things. Maybe it was the bright hair, or maybe it was his loud and opinionated nature. Whatever it was, Kenny had had to help him out of more than a few scrapes which could have easily ended with Kyle being six feet under the ground and Ms. Broflovski wailing over a perfectly cared for grave. It was something always weighing on Kenny's mind. 

 

Right now, If Sheila opened the door he’d have put on a pleasant smile and cover his ears. She would rant at him about how he should go home but then wouldn’t let him leave out of worry. Gerald would just be confused. It was fifty fifty chance IF he’d even let us in. Ike wouldn’t question it just shout, “Kyle your boyfriend is here!”. Ikes a cool dude. And Kyle would boil the kettle and ask if he “wanted to watch the world burn”. Ha! No, he would never do that, but he would put on the kettle and give him a cup of some fancy tea, probably bless his tired soul with a rant about how he had put himself and Karen in danger. When they were younger his accusatory tone would have grated on the blonde's nerves, but Kenny had long learned now that any anger the redhead showed was out of complete worry and concern for others. Kyle just wasn’t good at expressing his feelings well without pissing people off. 

 

Kyle had really gotten into herbal tea recently. Trying hard to stop his caffeine addiction by going cold turkey, so now he just drinks an ungodly amount of “caffeine free” teas to make up for it. Trying to trick his mind into thinking he wasn't missing out. It didn’t help though. Kenny knew it was only a matter of time till he broke. Kyle knew too. They weren’t idiots after all.

 

Kenny frowned at Karen. There was no answer. There was always someone downstairs. Sheila hated everyone staying in their rooms. They weren't home? But That couldn't be right. Where would they be? He was about to go look in a window hoping to see some hit. 

 

When the door suddenly swung open.

 

To his joy, it was Kyle, that answered the door looking no worse to wear, other than puffy red eyes. Which made Kenny’s stomach drop. He had only seen Kyle cry a handful of times and each of them was when Kyle was overwhelmed. Maybe he wasn’t taking the whole “End of the fucking world” thing well. Their gracious host grabbed and dragged them to both in and shut the door straight away.  Placing all the locks back in place. Kenny frowned at the lack of greeting. Something was up.

 

Kenny placed his hands on his shoulders. Hoping to ground his friend. Speaking gently. “Ky? You okay??”

 

Kyle let out a single hollow laugh. Rubbing at his eyes. Kenny following the movement seeing huge bags under his forest green eyes. He mustn’t have slept a wink. 

 

“What other than we’re all going to die?”

 

Kenny frowned. Well fuck.... Kyle never gives up... This infection couldn’t be what broke him. He always had a solution. Seeing him like this momentarily put Kenny off. He had expected him to be in control and already planning how to fix this mess, like he always does. Kenny couldn’t think of one single thing that could stop the red head. 

 

Instantly he realized where he had gone wrong. Kyle wasn't the end all fixer. He never should have put that much pressure on the teen. Everyone always expected Kyle to give them solutions and fix everything. Well not this time. Instead Kenny came to the decision that whatever was to come. They could handle it. Together.

 

“Kyle…” Kenny frantically looked around leading Kyle over to the kitchen table sitting him. Taking his own place next to him. He held his hand rubbing little circles on his palm. Hoping it would break the others focus on whatever was stressing him. "Talk to me?"

 

Memories of when they had their first real fight surfaced. Months ago.

 

_He had gone to Kyles room after a robbery gone wrong. He had been stabbed. Asking Kyle for help. He always used to do that. Even when he knew he’d probably die, and Kyle wouldn’t remember it. The red head always let him and patched him up... But that night, Kyle had had enough and tried to talk to him about his vigilantism. Telling him he couldn’t keep doing this. That he was hurting. That HE could see it._

_Kenny didn’t take that news well. AND it showed._

_Thinking back on it now he is surprised Shelia hadn’t knocked in the door and kicked him out for all the shouting._

_He’d never been that angry towards his friend, and It wasn’t until Kyle started crying that Kenny realized his mistake. They both sat on his bed. Hugging._

_The next words stuck a cord with him. He’d never forget them._

_“I don’t know how you can expect me to keep doing this... When you won’t even talk to me...”_

_They talked till Kenny had to go home and get ready for school. That was the night Kyle found out he couldn’t die. And it was the first time he had listened. So many years of trying to tell him and it was only after a huge fight that the redhead had listened. It was so very Kyle._

 

After that incident whenever they hit a topic too close to home or one the other didn’t like, they referenced “talk to me”. It was like a signal, one saying that the other would listen no matter what and they’d figure out whatever was bothering them. Kenny didn’t realize this at the time in the heat. But he needed that reassurance that they were okay no matter what the other said.

 

The ginger’s resolve broke straight away, and he took a shaky breath. Steading himself.

 

“...It’s... mom and dad-” Kenny instantly didn’t like where this was going. “-They went to go pick up our cousins in Denver. They were meant to be back in just a couple of hours, but they haven't come back yet..."

 

Kenny nodded. Unlike him, Kyle had a good relationship with his parents. Sure, they fought but he loved his parents. “Maybe they just stuck somewhere? The roads are completely blocked off...”

  

“No. This was almost 2 days ago. Something must have happened...” Kenny blinked. They were preparing that early? Seemed like they knew it was going to go to hell and were trying to get away before it reached us. Of course, they were going to escape. Kenny suppressed the pit in his stomach that Kyle might have left without telling him.

 

Kyle’s parents probably wouldn’t be coming back. Unless they were infected.... Then they might come back. Just not in a friendly way. 

  

His morbid thoughts were interrupted next by Kyle continuing.

 

“I don’t know what to do. Like Ike’s upstairs but I don’t know what to do. He’ll depending on me! What if something happens? What if someone tries to break in? I don’t know how to properly defend myself or him for that matter! Or heaven forbid one of the infected get us! Where are we going to get food? Are we going to stay here? If not, where are we going to go? Should we go somewhere else but then where-?”

 

Kyle had sneaked his way out of Kenny’s grip and was running around looking very much like he was panicking. It reminded him strangely of Tweak, which was extremely concerning! Karen and Kenny exchanged equally worried looks. This wasn’t good. A panicked Kyle was an unstable one. They both followed his anxious strides. Kenny keeping up easily.

 

“Kyle. Kyle. HEY!” Kyle flinched at his loud voice. Kenny immediately entering his personal space, surrounded him in a tight hug. Karen joining in the embrace. Both hoping to ground the red head.

 

“It’ll be okay… We’re here to help, if anyone comes in.... I’ll return to my Mysterion days and fuck them up! Your dining chairs looking pretty lethal right now, to be totally honest.”

 

Kyle snorted. His shoulders untensing slightly, which Kenny counted as a win in his books. 

 

“Yeah Kyle! We’ll figure this out, it’ll be okay!” Karen’s optimism shined bright even in this dire situation. Kenny flashed her an appreciative smile. 

 

“Yeah man! Together we’ll fuck up everyone! I’ll be the brawn and you be the books.” Kyle snorted.

 

“Brains.”

 

“Exactly! See you got this!” The red head chuckled into his chest.

 

“Yeah... Okay….” He straightened up, sneaking out of their tight embrace and walked over to the sitting room peeking out at the chaos outside. Kenny and Karen following. Mirroring the action. There were a few people going around with bats, but they weren’t paying attention to houses they were only looting cars so far. That was.... worrying. But he had to concentrate and figure out what their next move should be.

 

Kyle put on the kettle and took out three mugs. Who knew how long electricity would still be running? He wanted to appreciate it while it was still here. He was going to miss that comfort…. If he survived long enough to even reminisce about it.

 

They all sat down at the table. Kenny and Karen across from Kyle, who was now nursing a strong cup of black coffee. Karen and Kenny had hot chocolate in front of them. It was one of his favourites to calm down he thought they might need it right now. Especially since he had probably freaked them royally out with his own episode. His head was back now though. It had been a moment of weakness. One he wasn’t proud of.

 

Kyle let himself have few sips before he spoke until then he thought over things in his head, trying to secure some basic plan. Nothing had to be concrete just enough right now. Just something so they knew where to go from here.

 

 

_Sip_

 

 

Food and shelter should take priority… but if they left and ran into trouble the four of them couldn’t handle much. Staying here was fine but it wasn’t the best place. Too close to the rest of south parks population, most of which was reacting violently to their new reality.  

 

Kenny was a strong fighter, He knew that much. Kyle himself was fast and nimble with all the years of basketball but that could only go so far when he didn’t have much, if any fighting experience. Other than decking Cartman in the face of course. He didn’t know how well Ike and Karen could handle themselves. But Ike was into sport, so he’d probably be strong enough to handle himself.

 

 

_Sip_

 

 

They needed a place to stay; Somewhere well protected, central to the town? Or on the outskirts so they could leave if they wanted? But where would they even go? Everywhere is the same now. Beds would be nice, a kitchen (even though, who knew how long that would be useful?) a fence around it. Not many places had all those here. In fact, he couldn’t think of any examples of a secure place like this. At least none that were unoccupied. 

 

_Sip_

  

Food? They needed a way to get food. South park was nearly always covered in snow… They couldn’t grow anything unless it matured extremely fast or they used a greenhouse. Maybe that was an idea? No, none of them knew how to grow anything. Then again... The library has lots of books on how to garden. The library would have books about everything! Maybe he could pay it a visit. No one would visit the place now. 

 

 

_Sip_

 

Library would almost be a good place to set up if it wasn’t for the fact there was nothing there but paper and it was kind of smack dap in the middle of the town which meant dangerous. 

 

Knowing their shelter would be a good idea too. In case they did run into trouble, at least they’d know how to escape easily and use the area to their advantage. Somewhere no one else would go to…. Where no one would think of going to for whatever reason... That had food and wasn’t a shop. They all be looted by now anyways or at least close to being bare. It was everyman for himself.

 

He stared at his cup silently. The others watched patiently already finished their hot cocoas. Kenny barely containing his grin, he could see the cogs in his brain turning. Then Kyle realised something he couldn’t believe he had missed!

 

“Wait a minute!”. He had boiled the kettle. There was still electricity. He stood up nearly knocking his chair down and practically ran towards the stairs.

 

Karen shadowing him confused and Kenny just chuckling used to this, leaning closer to the redhead as they entered his room.

 

“You know I love it when you string me along.” Kyle laughed, sparing him an affectionate glance. Kenny was just glad he had made Kyle chill out. Kyles laugh made it seem like everything would be okay, and with His favourite ginger leading them he was certain they would be.

 

“You going to let us in on what you’re doing or-?” Karen raised an eyebrow at Kyle moving about his room. Kenny situating himself on the bed with a loud “oof!”. Knowing Kyle will explain when he’s ready. 

 

“I should have realised sooner. I’ve been so concerned with freaking out that I never noticed.... I don’t know why I’m so dense.”

 

“Aww no, Babe! You’re not dense. You’re the smartest person I know.”

 

“Smartest person I know too!” He blushed lightly at their compliments.

 

“I’m going to see if everyone else is okay” Kenny tilted his head towards him, from where he was lying down. Interested.

 

“Oh yeah?? How?” Kyle smirked. Kenny grinning back full force. This was the guy he’d follow to hell and back.

 

“Facebook, obviously.” Kenny and Karen let out “Ohhh” noises. They hadn’t internet in their house. So, they hadn’t even thought of that. But now that Kyle had suggested it. It seemed so obvious now.

 

Kyle opened his account and saw an influx of unopened messages. The second he logged into messenger he was bombarded from Stan. He must have been so worried. Glancing over all his inbox, he decided a more efficient route. Who knew how long they’d have internet might as well try and limit the time waffling.

 

He created a group consisting of all his “close” friends from school. Which was basically just the people in his class. But now that he had thought about it he probably should have left some people out. Well... One person. He could regret adding Cartmen later.

 

Kyle Broflovski has created a group chat- Hey guys! How is everyone holding up? – Stan Marsh, Kenny McCormick, Eric Cartmen and 23 others.

 

He stretched his back and began typing. He had a feeling this was going to be a mess. No. He knew this would be a shit storm. 

 

 

**Kyle Broflovski-**

_Hey! I made this group to check that everyone is okay and to see if anyone wants to meet and stick together while this mess sorts itself out._

 

  

He purposely made it sound like it would be okay, but from what he’d seen that wasn’t likely. The army was probably not coming anytime soon. From what he had seen the whole country is on lockdown and there’s absolutely no emergency services. With No police patrolling the street there was nothing stopping the rioters, or Ambulances assisting the sick and injured. This was all was very dire. They needed to be careful and look out for each other.

 

 

_So, can everyone reply? To just let me know if you’re safe._

 

 

 

**Stan Marsh-**

_THERE YOU FUCKING ARE!!_

_I’VE BEEN TRYING TO CALL YOU ALL MORNING!_

Kyle winced. He really should have made sure his phone wasn’t on silent. Which was stupid because why would he have had it on silent. It’s not like studying would do him much good now. Also, maybe checked on stan. Yeah, he should have done that. He didn’t even see if his “super” best friend was okay. He was so distracted with his parents and Ike that he didn’t even worry about his friends. He was a shit best friend.

 

 

 **Kyle Broflovski –** _Sorry Stan._

_It’s been a hectic morning. Kenny and Karen are here._

_All of us are okay._

 

 

 **Stan Marsh –** _I was so worried._

_Literally thought you were dead!!_

_FFS!!_

 

 

 **Kyle Broflovski** – _Sorry again Stan._

 

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _We’re all ok here._

_My mom and dad are trying to call the Authorities to see what they recommend we do._

_But so far no answer._

 

 

**Butters scotch-**

_I’m good but..._

_My parents went out a few hours ago to get some shopping_

_but..._

_They haven’t come back yet._

_Do you think they’re okay?_

 

 

 **Kyle Broflovski** – _Don’t worry Butters._

_I’m sure they’re fine, probably just got stuck in traffic or something. 🙂_

_Let’s not freak out when we have no idea if there’s anything even wrong._

 

 

“Maybe you should take your own advice~” Kenny grinned over his shoulder. Kyle rolled his eyes, the blond leaning against his chair making it hard to move it. He jammed his elbow into his friend trying to knock him off his seat. Kenny allowing his hand to drop easily. 

 

“Ohhh ha-ha! Yeah, I'm a big hypocrite I know..."

 

 

 **Butters Scotch-** _I sure hope so._

**Kyle Broflovski -** _Everyone keep an eye out for them._

_Let us know if you see them._

 

 

Kenny’s grin dropped. His next words coming out quietly.“Do you really think they’re just stuck somewhere?”

 

Kyle didn’t answer for a second. No, he didn’t think they were alive… When he was looking outside earlier he could have sworn he had seen Mr and Ms Scotch... Maybe it was his imagination, but they didn’t look too good... Sickly... From what he could see from his telescope a lot of the town was dead. Or undead. He couldn’t decide which would be worse. Kyle of course didn’t say this to Kenny. He and the nieve blond were very close. IT would devastate him.

  

“I don’t know.... But I don’t want him to worry.”

 

 Kenny understood but seemed like he wanted to add something. Whatever it was he didn’t continue, so Kyle disregarded it. There was so much to do.

 

 

 **Babe –** _Omg there’s people looting downtown. :O_

_All the shops have broken windows and everything! Wtf???_

 

 **Tweek Tweak-** _THEY’RE WHAT??? IS OUR CAFE OKAY??????_

_This is Craig. Tweek and I are fine. btw_

 

“Awwww! Craig and Tweek are together? What adorable love birds!... Kinda reminds me of the two of us…! ” Kenny dreamily leaned over his chair almost knocking him over, all the while having the gall to flash him a cheeky wink. Kyle grumbled, pointedly ignoring his friend and continued.

 

 

 **Kyle Broflovski** – _I think it goes without saying to avoid main street or anywhere there might be lot of people._

_They could be infected_

_There’s going to be a lot of crime with no police enforcing law and it’s better to not get involved._

**Eric Cartmen-** _Who died and put you in charge?_

 

 

Ahhh so it begins. Kyle readied himself for a fight. There was no avoiding it.

 

 

**_Eric Cartmen changed Kyle Broflovski’s nickname to “Jew”_ **

 

 

 He groaned. Kenny shifting behind him. Full attention on the screen as well. While Kyle’s fingers expertly typed.

 

 

 

 **Jew-** _I’m not “in charge”, No one is. I’m just making sure everyone is putting their safety first._

 

 **Stan Marsh-** _Cartman shut the fuck up if you aren’t going to help._

 

 

 **Eric Cartman-** _What?_

_Like people can’t look out for themselves?_

 

 

 

 “....I think it goes without saying Cartman’s doing just fine.” He grumbled.

 

 

 

 **Jew-** _Of course people can look after themselves but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t check up every once and while._

 

 

 

**_Eric Cartmanchanged Kenny McCormick nickname to “Poor boi”_ **

****

 

 

Kyle sighed Of course Cartman wasn’t going to have any good input. What had he expected? 

 

 

 

**_Eric Cartman changed Stan Marsh’s nickname to “Hippie”_ **

 

 

 

Kyle face palmed. “For fuck sake” It never stops. Kenny reached forward edging Kyle away from the screen and began typing. Kyle just glaring at the wall until he pulled away. 

 

 

 **Jew-** _Yo everyone this is Kenny. Eric Im gonna kick you outta the group if ya dont stop being an asshole and play nice. Kyles just trying to sort out this entire shit. Could you actually be helpful? I know it’s hard for you but TRY. For me <3 ily_

**Eric Cartman** \- _Hey poor boi!_

_Why you using your boyfriends account and not your own?_

_Not able to steal a proper phone while looting?_

 

 

 **Jew-** _Shut the fuck up Cartman!_

 

 

 

 **Token Black-** _Hey._

_Sorry to interrupt this riveting conversation._

_But what is the point of this group?_

_I don’t feel like scrolling u[._

 

 

 **Jew-** _Thanks for the ACTUAL input Token._

_I made this group because I believe we have a better chance of surviving this epidemic together._

_With the combination of sickness and starvation, we’re in danger._

_Food and supplies will be easier to get if we have teams and we can all find a place to_

_Stay until this all calms down._

 

 

 

 

 

Kyle sighed finally leaning back resting from his frantic typing. He rubbed his forehead. Adding.

 

 

 

 

  **Jew-**

_Also, it’s important we establish any plans now because who knows how long we’ll have_

_electricity or internet, we won’t be able to contact each other._

 

 

  

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _I agree with Kyle._

_Who knows how long we will be able to message._

 

 

 **Craig Tucker-** _We’re in._

 

 

 **Babe Stevens** – _Let’s do it._

 

 **Butters Scotch** \- _Well I think that’s a mighty great idea Kyle!_

 

 

  

 

Kyle felt immense relief. Shortly after that everyone agreed that they should find a safe meeting point and go there at the specific time. 

 

 

 

 **Butters Scotch-** _I'd love to._

_But do you think I should leave?_

_I mean what if my parents come back while i'm gone?_

 

 **Jew-** _Well..._

 _I'd feel better if you had someone with you._

_Maybe leave a note telling them you’re with us and to stay safe?_

 

 

Kyle tried not to think about Ms and Mr Scotch dead in an alley somewhere. Though that was becoming increasingly hard the longer he tried to remember if it was actually them he had seen before.

 

 

 

After a few more moments of chatter everyone seemed on board, Well everyone except Eric.

 

 

 **Eric Cartman-** _Are you guys serious!?_

_You’re going to let the JEW lead you?_

_He’s probably already planning how to fuck you all over somehow._

 

 

Kyle rolled his eyes deciding now was probably as good a time as any to get up and get another cup of coffee. Ignoring Cartman was sometimes the best thing to do. Also, most satisfying because the kid usually got all pissy. Coffee would keep his mind off everything going on. Give him something to do.

 

“Do you guys want anything to drink or something to eat?” Kenny flashing him his award-winning smile. Kyle couldn’t help mirroring the expression. The blond’s happiness was just so infectious. 

  

“Aww what a great host! I’d really go for something to eat right about now!” Kyle glanced at Karen noticing her watching him bashfully like she wanted to say something.

 

“If it’s not too much trouble?”

 

“Of course not, I'll be back soon.”

 

"I hate to see him leave but I love to see him go!" In the corner of his eye he saw Kenny wiping a fake tear. 

 

Kyle shook his head at his antics and then left to go make something for all of them. Telling them to inform him “if anything interesting happens.”

 

After some time, he returned with some sandwiches and a salad for himself. Karen and Kenny were whispering quietly just before he entered. But when they saw him enter they just stopped instantly...? Now that was suspect... Kyle was many things but Stupid had never been one of them. Had they been talking about him?

 

“Hey, this is all we have, there’s not much left in the house. Well there is, but nothing that doesn’t literally take forever to make.”

 

“This looks great. Thank you, Kyle!” Karen smiled. 

 

“Stop this is amazing! Thanks Ky! You’re the best.” Kenny said brightly while they both dug in. Kyle smiled and leaned over to skim what others were saying. And immediately frowned. They were talking about... him? What??

 

He went to ask Kenny about it when, but when his gaze landed on the blond he realised that Kenny looked  guilty. Wait no...scratch that, very guilty. Avoiding his eyes, no matter what, while nibbling on one of his own carefully crafted sandwiches. It would have been comical if they didn’t have to deal with the end of the world. It was a look Kyle knew well. He always went like this if he did something Kyle would be angry about. Kenny was an awful liar. Well at least if Kyle was the person he was lying to. 

 

Now Kyle was concerned.

 

“Kenny... What did you do...”

 

“..Nothing....” He spoke with his mouth full.

 

“Nothing...? At all?” Kyle didn’t believe that for one minute.

 

“Well....” Kenny fidgeted under Kyles scrutinizing gaze. “..Cartmen was running his mouth about how he should be in charge of the group....”

 

“Okay..? That’s not surprising?”

 

“Well Stan and I kinda got mad....He started spewing shit about you.” Kyle raised his eyebrow at that. 

 

“Again.. Nothing new?” 

  

“Well... we both started saying how you’d be the perfect leader.”

 

Ohhhh... no. 

 

“And... Wendy might have said we should put it to a vote and We nominated you”

 

“WHAT THE HELL KENNY???” The blond winced at Kyles raised voice.

 

“I’m sorry Ky! I wasn’t thinking. I know you don’t want the responsibility” Kyle was ready to go on full rant mode, but Kenny continued. Quickly swallowing what was in his mouth. “BUT!! I really think you’re the best person for it! And everyone else seems to agree... Well everyone except Eric but who cares!”

 

“Yeah Kyle! Everyone jumped on the suggestion straight away!” Karen tried to come to her brothers rescue. 

 

Kyle frowned. “Yea! Cause they’re all scared and confused! I’m not the right person to turn to! Ugh!” the screen blinked showing different chat bubbles. 

 

 

 **Butters Scotch** – _Eric. I think we should all just get along._

 

 

 **Eric Cartman –** _Shut up butters!_

_No one asked for your opinion_

  

 

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _Eric! maybe we should be diplomatic about this and vote?_

_For fairness of course. 😊_

  

 **Eric Cartman-** _Fucking FINE!!!_

_I’ll do your stupid vote!!_

 

 

 **Butters Scotch-** _Kyle has my vote._

 

  

 **Eric Cartman-** _BUTTERS!!_

_WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING??_

_YOU'RE JOINING THEM?!_

  

 

 **Butter’s Scotch-** _Well it’s not about taking a side...._

 

 

 **Eric Cartman-** _You know what??!_

_SAVE IT FOR SOMEONE WHO CARES_

_I don’t want to hear it. You’re dead to me._

 

 

 **Butters Scotch-** _Well geez..._

_I’m mighty sorry Eric._

  

 **Bebe Stevens –** _Boys lets face it My girl is perf for the job!_

_Wendy FOR THE WIN!_

 

 

 

Kyle stared. Fuck he didn’t want to oversee everyone’s safety. This group was quickly spiralling to that. Every time he started to type to tell them Wendy is more suited someone else would agree that Kyle should lead. When had people decided to put their lives in his hands? Why did everyone think he could help them?

 

 

 

 **Wendy Testaburger** \- _I'm endorsing Kyle. 🙂_

 

 

Kyle groaned. Wendy was now his only hope. Hopefully she got enough votes so that he wasn’t in charge. Kyle turned away, pointily ignoring the screen and tucking into his food. He stared way too intensely at the plain salad. Suddenly realising something. 

 

How was he going to keep resupplying his insulin? If he didn’t have any means to get any more. It would be near impossible to find a constant supply. This was bad! He had quite a lot put aside, he had only just gotten a resupply the last day but that wouldn’t keep him going forever.... He needed to start being extra careful about when and how much insulin he takes from now on. There was no one to go to if he completely ran out. Or if he had a diabetic attack....

 

Well Fuck. He was doomed to die. If the sickness didn’t get him then this would! He was a literal ticking time bomb.

 

He felt fingers intertwine with his. Stopping him from biting his nails. He hadn’t even noticed he was doing it. He needed to work on that nervous tick.

 

Kenny’s baby blue eyes searched his face.  

 

“You okay? Don’t get stressed out about this stuff. Sorry I even suggested it. You can just tell everyone you don’t want to do it.”

 

Kyle shook his head. Squeezing his hand slightly “No it’s actually fine, I’m just... thinking.” He decided not to mention how his diabetes might become a problem. There was no stopping it, just prolonging it. No point worrying everyone when there was nothing they could do for him. He’d always have to keep his vials and needles with him. When he finally ran out he’d-

  

“I’ll figure it out...” If he was going to die. He’s rather do it after making sure everyone was surviving this mess.

 

With new found determination he began typing interrupting Cartman Insulting people left, right and centre, and from the sounds of it he wasn’t winning whatever argument he was making.

 

 

 **Jew-** _If we’re done voting now can we tally it and decide._

 

 

 **Butters Scotch-** _But Kyle! Red, token and Ike haven’t voted yet._

_Sure! You haven’t even said who you’re voting! 🙁_

 

 

 

Kyle side eyed the siblings. Who were still happily eating cross-legged on his bed. so, they had already told everyone who they were voting for me. On HIS Facebook account?! What nerve.

 

  

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _Don't wor_ _ry butters that won’t change the outcome by much._

_I'd argue it won’t affect anything at all._

 

 

 **Jew-** _I’m voting for Wendy._

 

 **Eric Cartman-** _JEW VOTING FOR THE BITCH._

_FUCKING TYPICAL_

_You all have no idea the mistake you're making._

 

 

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _So I've gone back and counted all the votes_

_Kyles won!_

_With 9 votes, I had 6, 1 for both Cartman and Clyde. :)_

_Congratulates Kyle!_

 

 

**_Stan Marsh changed Kyle’s Broslowski’s nickname to “Commanda Kyle”_ **

 

 

 

 **Eric Cartman –** _FUCK YOU ASSHOLES!_

 

 **Hippy –** _What’s your first order of business boss? 🙂_

 

  

Kyle’s thought was getting darker and darker. He was probably going to die before most of the others. Well if it was up to him at least. He needs to keep everyone safe. And have someone who could take over when he was gone.

 

 

 

 **Commanda Kyle-** _First thing’s first._

_I'm making the runner up, my second in command._

_Just in case something happens and I'm not around._

_So, Wendy you up for the job?_

 

 **Eric Cartman-** _You must be kidding!!!_

 

  

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _Totally! 🙂_

_I’ll do my best to help._

 

 

 

_**Eric Cartman left the group chat.** _

 

 

 

Kyle sighed. Eric was gone anyways. That was slightly.... worrying. He might have been an asshole, but Kyle didn’t think he’d be okay on his own. He wasn’t the best at making... decisions in stressful situations. No… ANY situation.  He was a loose cannon ball. It was probably better he wasn’t with them. Eric would  just be abrasive and insulting to everyone. Though Kyle couldn’t help but feel slightly guilty, Eric wouldn't do anything truly bad to anyone other than annoy them. But making him a leader would have been a bad idea. Cartman couldn't keep everyone safe if his life depended on it. Wait he could if HIS life depended on it. 

 

Kenny sat silently beside him now done with eating. Karen was looking around his room. Oh yeah, she had never been in here before. Kenny was the only one who really visited. The room hadn’t changed much since elementary school. Other than the posters and him getting rid of all his toys. It was kind of a bare room now.

 

Kyle watched Karen flip through a book. 

 

“You still hungry? I can make more food. It’s no trouble”

 

“Na I'm good. Thanks for the feeding. You ignore us and keep doing what you’re best at! Bossing people around!” He grinned. Kyle punched him lightly but couldn’t really dispute the claim. He did really like telling people what to do. And sure, if you’re good at something might as well do it.

 

 

 

 **Commanda Kyle-** _Cool. I'm assuming everyone’s homes aren’t safe._

_We could try and wait it out._

_But I think that’s not very viable for people who live alone_

_or are in dangerous areas._

_So, I believe we should find a safe suitable shelter, so we don’t have to worry about safety as much._

 

 

 

 **Clyde Donovan-** _Why don’t we go to tokens?_

_He has a pool table and swimming pool!_

 

 

 

 **Commanda Kyle-** _That's actually..._

_A great suggestion Clyde!_

_But it’s tokens house we can’t just invite ourselves in._

 

 

 

**Tweek Tweak –**

_Craig- His house has a security system._

 

  

**Commanda Kyle-**

_I don't think the security system would work without electricity but_

_I think the wall around his house would keep everyone out._

_So, it doesn’t matter._

 

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _It would be the perfect place to set up._

 

 

**Commanda Kyle-**

_What do you say. Token?_

_Can we use your place for shelter until everything calms down?_

 

  

 **Token Black-** _Yeah fine._

_I don’t think I have enough beds for_

_everyone so maybe brings sleeping bags?_

 

 **Commanda Kyle** \- _Thanks Token._

_Let’s all meet at his as soon as possible!_

 

 **Clyde-** _Whoop whoop!_

 

 

 **Token Black-** _Okay_

_Just ring the bell and I'll let you guys in._

 

  

 **Commanda Kyle-** _Only leave when you think it’s safe enough to do so._

_Stay off busy streets and don’t go near the mall._

_We can decide where we’re going after that when we are all together._

 

 

 **Wendy Testaburger-** _Got it_ _! 🙂_

 

 **Commanda Kyle** _**-** I'm going to keep my data on._

_If anyone hits any trouble message where you are._

_And we’ll try and get to you ASAP._

 

 

 **Stan Marsh-** _Sooooooooo_

_You’re going to keep your phone on this time?_

 

 

 **Commanda Kyle-** _Stan!! I already said I was sorry!_

 

 

 

Kyle was starting to get impatient with all the mindless chatter that followed their plans. He’s much rather be talking to everyone in person. Also, all this sitting and typing was making him restless. Acting was much more his style rather than just saying what should be done. Though he was great at both.

 

 

 

 **Commanda Kyle** - _Listen Stan I'll apologize in person._

_See you all at tokens!_

 

 

 

Kyle sat trying to figure out the best course of action to make it to Tokens without much trouble. “Ken?”

 

“Yeah, Ky?” Kenny was flipping through a comic book on his table, he must have gone rooting around his wardrobe. The normality of having Kenny around, did wonders for Kyles nerves. Kenny didn’t seem too concerned with everything, so Kyle did his best to push all his anxiety’s down. Focusing on one thing at a time was the best way to go. And now they just needed to get to tokens and make sure everyone else did safely too. It sounded easy, but he already knew it wouldn’t be.

 

“How did you guys get here?”

  

“Oh, we came through the forest. Why?”

 

“I thought so... we'll be going through there again to get to tokens.”

 

He opened the chat to message Butters. Butters was one of the only people in the chat that was all by himself right now and considering they lived so close there was no need for him to travel alone. Plus be doubted butters would fare well if he had to get there by himself anyways. Although he wasn’t close to the naive blond, Kenny seemed to value him a lot so that automatically made Kyle hold him in high regard.

 

 

 **Kyle Broflovski-** _Hey Butters!_

_Was wondering if you wanted to come with Kenny, Karen and me?_

_We’ll come pick you up first and then we can travel to tokens together. 🙂_

 

 

 **Butters Scotch-** _Oh!_

_Well Kyle! That would be swell! :)_

_Thanks so much!_

 

 **Kyle Broflovski-** _Np!_

_Pack whatever you need._

_We'll be leaving soon. :)_

 

 

 

He told Karen and Kenny to gather some food and whatever clothes they wanted from the house while he did the same. Kyle sighed tiredly. It wasn’t even midday and he already felt emotionally and physically drained. Too much had happened. Maybe his tolerance for bullshit was no longer as much as it used to be. He remembered when he took everything in his stride. What had changed? 

 

Whatever it was he just needed this day to come to an _end._

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this ages ago but i'm only posting it now :) 
> 
> Kyle deserves love and happiness. But i'm not going to give it to him for some reason xD 
> 
> Why do i hurt the ones i love?


End file.
